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Friday, December 14, 2007

Honouring our parents is an act of obedience

by Sumayyah Meehan

THE family unit is one of the most important facets of a Muslim’s life. According to the Holy Quran, maintaining the ties of kinship is an act of obedience towards Allah. All Muslims must do their utmost to maintain these ties. Severing these ties, no matter what the reason, is considered to be a major sin in Islam.

Not only are Muslims required to keep in touch with their kin, but also it is essential for them to visit their kinfolk when they are sick and they have a financial compulsion to offer a helping hand when necessary.

Allah Almighty says in the Holy Quran: “And render to the kindred their due rights, as (also) to those in want, and to the wayfarer: But squander not (your wealth) in the manner of a spendthrift.” (17:26)

Within the family unit, however, parents are more revered and respected than any other member of the family. All Muslims have a duty towards their parents. This duty only comes second after the main responsibility of a Muslim, which is to live a life submitting to the Will of Allah.

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “Shall I inform you of the biggest of the major sins? Ascribing partners to Allah and being undutiful towards your parents.”

If you think about it, parents deserve our love and respect more than any other human being on the face of the earth. They brought us up when we burst into the World naked and with hungry mouths wide open waiting to be fed. Parents often sacrifice their own dreams, wealth and often work way beyond the call of duty to ensure that they give their kids the best in this world. Muslim parents painstakingly teach their children to live a life in accordance with the Quran and Sunnah, which will eventually mould the child into a pious Muslim adult who is a boon to society and not a burden.

As a result of a parent’s constant care, a loving bond forms between parents and children. Quite often Muslims will seek the advice of their parents before embarking on major life decisions like getting married, buying a house or other life-altering events. And the advice is often taken by the child and not simply ignored.

Muslims also help to financially support their parents in their twilight years. There are no such things as nursing homes in the Muslim world. Parents who can no longer care for themselves often move into their adult children’s homes and are cared for by their children for the rest of their lives. And even when the parent dies, the relationship still goes on. Muslim children often pray for Allah to be merciful to their deceased parents in just about every prayer they offer.

There is only one instance when a child is allowed to be disobedient towards a parent. And that is when the parent tries to lead the child away from Islam or attempts to force them to commit an evil deed. Only then can a child disobey a parent. However, even then the child is still obliged to educate the parents about the proper teachings of Islam.

Allah Almighty says in the Holy Quran: "But if they strive to make thee join in worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not; yet bear them company in this life with justice (and consideration), and follow the way of those who turn to me (in love): in the end the return of you all is to Me, and I will tell you the truth (and meaning) of all that ye did." (31:15)

Non-Muslim parents to Muslim converts enjoy the exact same level of respect that Muslim parents do. The duty of a Muslim to their parents is not based upon the religious orientation of the parent but rather on the sacrifices they made for their children.

The absolute pinnacle status of reverence held by a Muslim parent is not held by the father but rather by the mother! The Holy Quran recognises the pain women must endure to bear children and the hardships they face while raising them. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) once said, “Paradise is placed at the feet of mothers.”

Allah Almighty says about mothers in the Quran: “And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.” (31:14)

In this age, it is not uncommon to hear tales of some Muslim teens rebelling against their parents and completely ignoring the proper etiquette for treating parents in the Holy Quran. This is a real tragedy that could possibly change the face of Muslim parent/child relations for centuries to come. Both Muslim parents and the children they bear should preserve their bond at all costs. The tools needed to do this can be found for FREE in the Holy Quran. --(Khaleej Times, 14 Dec 07)

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